It’s normal for people to ask questions about things they can’t understand. However, some usually go overboard by asking absurd and insensitive questions. The latter is what an interdisabled couple had to go through, and here’s what they have to say about the odd questions.
Living with a disability can be one of the most difficult experiences. This is made all the more difficult by the fact that some people with disabilities have to face the possibility of not getting married or having children.
Those who do eventually find a partner are sometimes abandoned later in the relationship. However, some are blessed and lucky to find that special someone who would love and stand by their side against all odds.
But, sadly, that doesn’t take away from the challenges the duo would face as a couple, one of which includes negative and prying comments or questions from netizens about the disabled partner.
The above is the case of John and Jade Reynolds, a couple from Preston, Lancashire. The duo have been candid about their experiences as an inter-disabled couple, including how they constantly have to deal with some invasive and insensitive comments and questions from individuals. Here are the details of the duo’s story.
JADE STATE DETAILS
At 12, Jade was diagnosed with a very rare condition called acute transverse myelitis, causing inflammation of the spinal cord. According to Jade, the doctors had informed her that she was more likely to win the lottery than to develop the disease.
However, this was not the case for Jade. The condition forced her to be in a wheelchair, and she lived that way for about two decades.
Fortunately, she lived happily ever after with the love of her husband, John, and her two children. Jade and John first met in Bible college, and since then the latter has been one of his wife’s support systems.
INSIDE THE STRANGE QUESTIONS THE COUPLE GET
Together, the duo overcame some tough times, including the negativity surrounding their union. In 2022, the couple took to TikTok to reveal some of the common questions people online and offline have asked about Jade’s status and marriage.
In the now-viral video, John said he was frequently asked questions like “Can you have ‘seggs’?” “Can she be a good mom, though?” “Do you have a weakness for women with disabilities?
After the video reached over four million views, Jade also spoke about common questions people have asked her as a wheelchair user.
According to the mum-of-two, the questions include, “What did you do?” “Can I try in your chair?” “You’re too pretty to be in a wheelchair”, “Can you have children?” and “Close your eyes and tell me if you feel this.”
In a third TikTok clip, John confessed that people would go so far as to tell Jade she was “lucky” to be married to her husband, adding that one day John might leave her for a woman who doesn’t. is not disabled. The doting husband noted that such comments made it seem like he was favoring Jade by marrying her. John said:
“There is this frightening and common idea that people in wheelchairs or with any form of disability, who are also in a relationship, are somehow equivalent to winners of contests or have won a charity auction .”
Moreover, he explained that it was not so with his wife. According to John, Jade gives as much love as she receives from her husband. He said the mother-of-two was very sacrificial, smart and intelligent.
LEARN MORE ABOUT JADE EXPERIENCES
In addition to dealing with these common issues, Jade revealed that she also has to deal with people who want to know all about her condition, even if they have no relationship.
The Lancashire native confessed that these very personal questions frustrate her, especially if she’s having a bad day – but she’d laugh about it if she’s having a good day. Jade said she also learned to draw boundaries with people and insist on refusing to share her story.
While Jade has found a way to move past people who ask absurd and personal questions, she still has to deal with those who project their fears and insecurities onto her. According to her:
“I know other wheelchair users who have been asked, ‘Are you worried about your partner leaving you?’ Luckily, I wasn’t asked that.”
“People can sometimes project their insecurities onto me. They would say, ‘If I was in a wheelchair, I would be afraid my partner would leave me.’ I never think that,” she added.
Jade maintains that she is enjoying her life and doesn’t need people to put such insecurities and fears on her.
At the same time, she and her husband believe that as Christians it is best to forgive those who cross their borders with negative comments, because everyone makes mistakes.